Archive for June, 2005

BOOOORED!!!

Wednesday, June 22nd, 2005

I’m soooooo bored!!!

Everythings been dreary these past few days and I’m badly in need of a little dose of insanity!!!

School sucks… I’m stuck with boring G.E. subjects… Sheeeeesh! I have 3 hours of basic computer every week!!! IN ONE DAY!!! I’m stuck in my seat, barely able to keep my eyes open, while being taught how to use windows!!! <I’d rather hang myself!> AND THE HEAT!!!! Feels like im being roasted everyday!!! its raining everyday but still so freakin’ HUMID!!!

I miss my bestfriends… Mei’s back in Jersey… Myla’s now in Quatar!… and May, well, busy as usual… My birthday is coming up! you guys better mail me my gifts soon! hehehehe… (joke! but of course, jokes are half meant!)

Havent seen my high school ‘kada in a while too… and Lally…. hey! ahmishyah!!! when we gonna go out again?

UPLB Peepz… I’m longing to go back there and see you guys! RCY members and other alumni, our anniv’s coming up soon! hope to see you guys there!!! Badgers! whens our next climb?!

Twy… it seems that there are unseen forces blocking our way to see each other! We’ve been planning to meet for months and still to no avail!!! I wanna see your little Ayesha too!!!

I saw most of my pseudo-blockmates last sem yesterday… it was great seeing you guys even for a while! gumraduate kasi agad at nang-iwan eh! Ate elaine!!!! bat wala ka?! I was hoping that I’d see yah!

Well, I better go to sleep… gotta be in school in a few hours… I’m getting to old for this shit (undergrad school!!!)…

well, I just hope something interesting happens later… I’ll be applying for the mountaineers… hope that would make things a little more interesting…

GOODNIGHT TO ME… I hope that recurring dream I’ve had lately would stop bugging me…

<I wonder the people I mentioned here would ever get to read this… oh well…)

Here is gone…

Saturday, June 18th, 2005

Got this from my cousin’s blog… I think its worth sharing…

Read
this if you must, but understand that in the next few paragraphs you
will find no truths. No new understanding, nothing that after all that
is said and done will miraculously make your life better. All there is,
is what’s always have been and always will be for each and every moment
for the rest of your life. A moment is a significant point in time.
Everyone’s had it. And it hasn’t always been good and hasn’t always
been bad. No matter what the moment was for you, the fact is. You will
never get it back. After that moment is done, it’s gone for good. Of
course you’ll have other moments to come, some better. Some are worse.
Some may seem insignificant moments that bite you in the ass at the end
of the day, so live your life. Live it because you only get to live
this life once. Whatever you’ve done before is what got you to who,
what and where you are. Just like whatever you do now will get you to
where you’re going or what you’ll be. Always be aware of the
consequences of your actions. Just think. What if you knew then what
you know now when you were 16 would you have changed anything? Or done
things a little differently? Or would you have made the same choices
that got you here. There’s no going back. Time only moves forward. So
should you. The past should be left in memory not to be relived over
and over. Learn from the past so you don’t make the same mistake in the
future. Remember that you can’t always get what you want but maybe you
already got what you need. Don’t worry about other peoples lives.
 

Can you take me higher?

Wednesday, June 15th, 2005

Its been more that a year since my last climb! I badly miss the natural high of being up on a mountain!

Its so funny that during every climb, I’d curse myself while going uphill!!! Climbing would have been so much easier if I didn’t always have that HUGE pack strapped on my back! The small guys and the girls are soooo lucky that they just end up with "jetpacks" (small bags!)

Back in highschool, I would have never imagined that I’d love the mountains. My passion for the outdoors came out thanks to a short hike up the mud springs of Mt. Makiling with my dormates when i was still studying in UPLB. I then joined the UP Badgers’ Club, a civic-outdoor org and with them I had my first real climb up on Mt. Makulot.

I will never forget that climb! The supposedly easy climb ended up to be one of my most eventful! We missed the usual trail up the campsite and we tried looking for another way. Me and my party almost had an accident which would have left us badly injured or worse… dead! Imagine that for my first climb?! Anyway, we backtracked to the right trail and the dark reached us before we could get to the campsite… A newbie climber going night trekking! san ka?!

That night, up on Makulot, when everyone was asleep in their tents… I immortalized that moment in my mind… I got out of my tent, I embraced the cold <REALLY COLD> night wind, with only a long sleeved shirt and a windbreaker to keep me somewhat warm. I looked around… the night lights of batangas city on one side and the few specks of lights on the other side which were most probably fishing boats on the calm waters. and the STARS!!! The stars are sooooo much brighter up high! It seemed to me that I could reach out and grab them… From that moment on… I knew what was my heaven… UP THERE!!!

The group I joined wasnt solely focused on mountaineering so we rarely had climbs. I went along with the UP Mountaineers on some of their climbs… I also tagged along Ayuk’s (Sir Ilana) outdoor rec class…

Now in Dasma, I’m itching to climb again! well, I got in touch with the mountaineering group there. Recruitment starts next week and I’m really considering it!

I always listen to the song "HIGHER" before a climb…

When dreaming I’m guided through another world
Time and time again
At sunrise I fight to stay asleep
‘Cause I don’t want to leave the comfort of this place
‘Cause there’s a hunger, a longing to escape
From the life I live when I’m awake

So let’s go there
Let’s make our escape
Come on, let’s go there
Let’s ask can we stay?
Can you take me higher?
To the place where blind men see
Can you take me higher?
To the place with golden streets

Although I would like the world to change
It helps me to appreciate
Those night and those dreams
But, my friend, I’d sacrifice all those nights
If I could make the Earth and my dreams the same
The only difference is
To let love replace all our hate

So let’s go there
Let’s make our escape
Come on, let’s go there
Let’s ask can we stay?
Can you take me higher?
To the place where blind men see
Can you take me higher?
To the place with golden streets

So let’s go there
And let’s go there
Come on, let’s go there
Let’s ask can we stay?

Up high, I feel like I’m alive for the very first time
So high, I’m strong enough to take these dreams
And make them mine

So high, I’m strong enough to take these dreams
And make them mine

Can you take me higher?
To the place where blind men see
Can you take me higher?
To the place with golden streets

Up high, I feel like I’m alive for the very first time
So high, I’m strong enough to take these dreams and make them mine…

Goodbye to all the boo-hoos

Tuesday, June 14th, 2005

It has been
quite a while since my last relationship. I stopped long ago counting how long
it has been. I’ve been through all the
bitterness and angst of the break-up and I’ve healed. I’m past all the boo-hoos
and the sleepless nights.

 I’ve been in a
relationship for so long and I guess it made me fear the loneliness of being
“unhooked.” I was so caught up with the thought that I was “alone” not
realizing that I turned completely bitter, pathetic, and even desperate.

 The change I owe
so much to my friends. They stood by me all the way. They made me realize I’ll
never be alone. I’ve got friends in close proximity and some miles and others
even oceans away but near or far, they were always with me. Thanks to them, I’m
back to living life to the fullest.

  “CARPE
DIEM!” Seize the day… I live life one day at a time once more, appreciating
whatever crosses my way and grabbing whatever opportunity that drops by. Same
thing goes with relationships. I’m not in any commitment right now. I’m in no
big hurry to jump into another one. I’ve contented myself going out meeting new
people, going on friendly dates, and sometimes on little more than friendly
ones.

  We
go through life being with different people. We enter relationships and commitments
with so many “wrong ones” but that should not stop us. One day the “right one”
will come knocking at our doors and thanks to all those “wrong ones,” we have
become (hopefully) a better person for our “right one.” So, I say this, just
enjoy your time with all the “wrong ones!” Another thought, who knows, maybe
the “wrong one” would even end up to be the “right one.”

Si Ako

Tuesday, June 14th, 2005

Si ako

Name: Jason
– Birthdate: june 28, 1983
– Birthplace: makati
– Current Loc.: las pinas
– Eye Color: Dark Brown
– Hair Color: Dark Brown
– Righty or Lefty: righty
– Innie or Outtie: huh?! (if this is green… well… im an outtie!)

// series two - describe

– Your heritage:filipino/spanish/chinese
– The shoes you wore today: my black leathers
– Your hair: semi-kalbo
– Your eyes: need glasses! hahahaha!
– Your weakness: sweetness and mushiness
– Your Fav Food: STEAKS! and jap food
– One thing you’d like to achive: climb everest! (dare to dream!)

// series three - what i

– Your most overused phrase on ym .. oist!
– Your thoughts first waking up: first day funk! nyahahaha!
– The first feature you notice in the opposite sex: eyes
– Your best physical feature: hmmm… i’ll leave that to you
– Your bedtime: usually between 12am-5am
– Your greatest fear: being alone
– Your greatest accomplishment: volunteer works that i have done
– Your most missed memory: times spent with dear friends

// series four - you prefer

– Pepsi or coke: coke
– McDonald’s or Burger King: McDonalds ….
– Single or group dates: single… more intimate…
– Adidas or nike: adidas
– Lipton Ice Tea or Nestea: nestea
– Chocolate or vanilla: vanilla
– Cappuccino or coffee: coffee
– Boxers or briefs: boxers

// series five - do you

– Smoke: nope
– Take a shower everyday: of course!
– Have a crush(es): lots!
– who are they: theres too many of them but most are chinitas
– Do you think you’ve been in love: yeah
– Want to go to college: wanna graduate!!!
– Like high school: yeah… some of the best years of my life
– Want to get married: someday
—type with your fingers on the right keys: nope
– Believe in yourself: yeah!
– Get motion sickness: nope
– Think you’re attractive: i hope so… hahahaha!
– Think you’re a health freak: not really
– Get along with your parents: usually
– Play an instrument: nope… its my frustration

// series six - in the past month, did/have you

– Drink alcohol: yeah
— Made Out: ahehehehe….
– Go on a date: yup!
– Go to the mall?: yeah
– Eaten an entire box of Oreos: nope
– Eaten sushi: yes… homemade!
– Been on stage: not recently
– Been dumped: dumped isnt the word… broke off is much more like it
–Gone skating: ice skating

– Made homemade cookies: nope
– Been in love; recently? I dunno…
– Gone skinny dipping: last time was years back
– Dyed your hair: nothing to dye
– Stolen anything: kisses… =)

// series seven - have you ever

– Played a game that required removal of clothing?: hahaha! laro ng apoy!
–Been trashed or extremely intoxicated: yeah… picture me drinking a whole bottle of chivas alone!
–Been caught "doing something": not in the act… but was quite obvious… hahahahaha! those were the days!
– Been called a tease: i am a tease
– Gotten beaten up: no
– Shoplifted: nope
– If so, did you get caught: nope
– Changed who you were to fit in: slight… im with a group a lot younger than me

// series eight - the future

– Age you hope to be married: around my early 30s
– Numbers and Names of Children: 2, if its a girl, audrey jade
– Describe your Dream Wedding: somewhere outdoor and up high
– How do you want to die: sleeping or while saving someones life
– Where you want to go to college: im at DLSU-D now… but i wanna go back to UP… maybe for my masters
– What do you want to be when you grow up: a PR exec
– What country would you most like to visit: northern europe

// series nine - opposite sex (or same sex, if that’s your cup of tea)

– Best eye color: doesnt matter… as long as they’re expressive
– Best hair color? shiny black
– Short or long hair?: long straight
.– Best height: as long as shes smaller than me… i usually like petite girls
– Best weight: healthy weight… not too thin, not too fat
– Best articles of clothing: undies! nyahahaha!
– Best first date location: candlelit dinner… wine under the canopy of the stars
– Best first kiss location: no place in particular

// series ten - number of

– Number of girls kissed: uhhmm… a few…
– Number of boys kissed: family members only
– Number of drugs taken illegally: none
– Number of people I could trust with my life: lots!
– Number of CDs that I own: A LOT!!!
– Number of piercings: none
– Number of tattoos: none
– Number of times my name has appeared in the newspaper?: never, but my pic was… it was a group pic during a red cross awarding
- Number of scars on my body: one
- Number of things in my past that I regret: none

boo hoo!!!

Friday, June 3rd, 2005

boo hoo! Damn this friggin fever!!! Only got less than two weeks of vacation left and im wasting my time here at home!!! My eyes hurt from all the tv shows and movie marathons… My back is killing me for all the lying down!

I know im a homebody and I love being a couch potato… but not every damned day!!! I badly need to get out and have some fresh air!!! or pulluted even! it doesnt matter as long as I can haul my ass out from here!!!

I miss going out with my friends! I’ll see you soon…

Hopefully, tomorrow mawnin, after I return from lala land tonight, I’d be feeling  much better…